How to Practice the Tao of Steve

How to Practice the Tao of Steve

By Fossman

“Steve is the prototypical cool American male. Y’know, I’m talking about Steve McGarrett, alright? Steve Austin, Steve McQueen. Y’know, he’s the guy on his horse, the guy alone. He has his own code of honor, his own code of ethics, his own rules of living, man. He never, ever tries to impress the women but he always gets the girl.” Taken from the movie, this is the foundation of the Tao of Steve. A mix of Taoism, Buddhism and Heideggerian philosophy solidify the approach to interacting with women. Misogynistic or objectifying as the following may seem, it simply accounts for and makes sense of the obvious: Men and women are different creatures, operating on different timetables. Combining elements from those teachings, among others (such as the philosophies of “Hawaii Five-0,” “The Great Escape” and “The Six Million Dollar Man”), men are offered a glimpse at why women are better than they are at the chase. They’re smarter, more patient and (sometimes) more rational when it comes to this. And while men have trouble keeping from humping a tree, a few steps can at least level the playing field.

Things You’ll Need:

* Discipline
* A little smarts
* A little luck

Step1
Eliminate your desire. Or, as Dex says in The Tao of Steve, ” … when I’m hanging out with a woman, that’s all I’m doing is hanging out, talking, listening. I’m not sitting there thinking about how to get in bed with her. And this completely confuses them because they’re saying “Wait a minute. I’m so much better looking than this guy. Isn’t he attracted to me?” As much as you may be attracted to a member of the opposite sex, remove this from your consciousness. As basic mating rituals go, women can sniff out your intentions fairly quickly. The second you make it clear–even if only in your own thoughts–that you want more than the conversation at hand, “you’re finished, cuz women can smell an agenda like [feces] on a shoe.”
Step2
Be excellent in their presence. The basic tenets of “survival of the fittest” say that men and women are looking for the optimal pairing for the sake of their progeny. Rams butt heads to prove their worth. Some species of bird put on intricate displays of pageantry, ruffling their colorful feathers and even dancing to show what they have to offer. In the same way, you should do this. If you’re great at chess, beat someone in chess in front of her (not her). If you can speak multiple languages, put yourself in a situation where you can use one (or more) without seem like an arrogant show off.
Step3
Retreat or be fleeting. This is the harshest aspect of the Tao of Steve, but important. As much as women (and men) may not admit it, it’s difficult to be attracted to someone who’s fawning for attention at every moment. Later on in a relationship, this practice might prove integral to its salvation. But at the start it can seem suffocating. Additionally–and this is where philosophy comes in–Heidegger says human beings have an innate quality that tells us, “We pursue that which retreats from us.” If they can’t have you, they’ll want you, particularly after deftly performing steps 1 and 2.